Writers Block #1: The Real Reason You've Got Writer's Block

Channeling your inner Sophia Petrillo, picture this:

Tuesday, 9 p.m. You’re cozied up with your laptop, a fresh(ish) cup of coffee in hand, ready to write the scene—the one that will make readers swoon, clutch their chests, and maybe even throw their Kindle across the room in an emotional riot.

But . . . your mind goes blank. You stare at the blinking cursor like it personally betrayed you. So, you do what any reasonable writer would do. You mindlessly scroll Instagram. You Google “historical accuracy of men’s cravats in 1812.” You suddenly must clean your entire kitchen.

Sound familiar? Welcome to writer’s block, the universal menace of creative minds everywhere.

Welcome to writer’s block, the universal menace of creative minds everywhere.

But here’s the thing: writer’s block isn’t about lacking talent or avoiding discipline. It’s about your brain throwing a tantrum for a particular reason. And once you understand the reason, you can do something about it.

Let’s break down the psychological roots of writer’s block—especially for romance authors—so you can stop spiraling and pick back up that pen—or keyboard. Maladaptive perfectionism, cognitive avoidance, analysis paralysis, and creative fatigue, here we come!

Writer’s Block Isn’t a “Willpower” Problem—It’s a Brain Problem

First things first: You are not the problem. Your brain, however, might be working against you. Neuroscience tells us that creativity relies on two main brain networks:

The Default Mode Network (DMN) – Your imagination center, responsible for daydreaming and story ideas.

The Executive Control Network (ECN) – Your logical side, responsible for editing and decision-making.

Ideally, these two systems take turns. The DMN gives you the idea; the ECN refines it. But when you’re stressed, overwhelmed, or second-guessing yourself, the ECN gets bossy and starts shutting down creative flow before you begin.

This means:
You have plenty of ideas but can’t get them onto the page.
You start a sentence, hate it immediately, and delete it.
You spend more time worrying about your writing than actually writing.

Again, sound familiar? That’s your executive brain micromanaging your creative brain into paralysis.

Now, let’s talk about why this happens specifically to romance authors.

The Four Main Causes of Writer’s Block (Especially for Romance Writers)

1. Maladaptive Perfectionism: The Fear of Not Being “Good Enough”

If you're finding yourself rewriting the same sentence twelve times, second-guessing your entire plot, or stressing over whether the deep ocean blue of your hockey hero’s eyes has been mentioned too much, you might be stuck in perfectionism hell.

Romance-specific red flags:

“Is this love scene too cheesy? Too spicy? Too . . . clinical?”
“Will the enemies become lovers too soon?”
“What if this heroine is too close to [insert favorite author’s leading lady]?”

Neuroscience tells us that creativity relies on two main brain networks.

2. Cognitive Avoidance: Everything But Writing

Romance gets judged. A lot.

Despite being one of the best-selling genres in publishing, it still has to fight for respect. That external judgment can creep into your subconscious and make you freeze up, and that's when you suddenly need to take care of non-writing "important" things. 

Romance-specific red flags:

“I've neglected my Pinterest board of hero inspo. Refresh!”
“My smut sticker collection is in such a shambles . . ."
*Watches YouTube video on the real order to read SJM's series*

3. Analysis Paralysis: Too Many Choices, Not Enough Action

Ever spend three hours debating whether your hero should have a hidden motivation perfect for the third-act breakup or an enemies-to-lovers backstory, or does he turn his player ways around? Too many choices = creative shutdown.

Romance-specific red flags:

“Should they confess their feelings now or after a dramatic (and preventable misunderstanding)?”
“Do I need another subplot?”
“Should I alternate first-person by chapter, or should it be third-person?”

4. Burnout & Stress: Your Brain Needs a Nap

If you’re juggling a job, family, or just trying to be a functional human, your creative energy might be completely drained before you even open your laptop.

Romance-specific red flags:

You want to write, but you’re mentally exhausted.
Every time you sit down to work on your book, you suddenly remember 47 other things you “should” be doing.
You’re constantly battling self-doubt, imposter syndrome, or just plain "meh" feelings about your book.

How Writer’s Block Manifests in Your Writing Life

Now that we’ve uncovered the culprits behind writer’s block, let’s talk about how it sneaks into your process—often disguised as productivity. It’s like that one toxic ex who keeps showing up with “good intentions” but always leaves you spiraling.

Procrastination Disguised as “Research”

You tell yourself you must understand the entire history of horse breeds before you can write your next scene. Maybe you’re convinced you need a Ph.D. in Regency-era fashion to describe your heroine’s ball gown. (Spoiler: You don’t.)

Deep-diving into research feels productive, but it’s a trap. There’s a fine line between gathering necessary details and spending three hours determining whether your fictional duke’s title is historically accurate. Write the scene first—fix the details later.

Constantly Switching Projects

New ideas? Thrilling. Finishing a book? Terrifying.

So, instead of pushing through that tricky middle section, you convince yourself your new idea is the one. Cue the cycle: You abandon your current WIP, start fresh, and ride the high—until you hit another tough spot; then you scrub, rinse, and repeat.

Or maybe you’re not jumping to a whole new story but still avoiding the scene by distracting yourself with world-building or character inspo. You tell yourself you’re “working” when really, you’ve spent an hour meticulously curating your hero’s mood board on Pinterest. (Look, I get it. But put the aesthetically tortured duke aside and get back to the draft.)

The Never-Ending Edit Loop

You write a paragraph. Hate it. Edit it. Tweak it. Reword it. Delete it. Rewrite it. Realize it was better the first time. Undo. Redo. Suddenly, an hour has passed, and you have negative words to show for it.

This is the perfectionist’s trap. Your first draft isn’t supposed to be flawless—it’s supposed to exist. Give yourself permission to write a bad sentence. Or an entire bad chapter. You can’t edit what you don’t finish, and over-polishing a single paragraph won’t get you to “The End.”

Too many choices = creative shutdown.

The First Step to Overcoming Writer’s Block: Awareness

Before you can fix writer’s block, you need to recognize your trigger.

Ask yourself:

Am I overthinking and stuck in perfectionism?
Am I scared of what people will think of this book?
Am I drowning in decisions and need to simplify?
Am I just mentally exhausted and need a break?

Your brain is not broken. You need to outsmart it—and that’s exactly what we’ll tackle next.

Coming Up in Part 2: How to Kick Writer’s Block to the Curb

• How to retrain your brain for creativity (science-backed techniques!)
• Hacks to trick yourself into writing (even when you don’t feel like it)
• The best ways to deal with perfectionism, fear, and burnout

Until then, stay sassy, keep writing, and know you've got this!